| sex | 100% |
|---|---|
| age | 20 |
| height | 0.23 american football fields |
| weakness | rare earth magnets |
Josh
The ringleader in this circus, Josh, provides the pipes to the band. In his spare time, Josh breeds mutts. The more inhumane the combination, the more likely he is to do it. He made a pug and golden retriever breed, which was ever so sick and ghastly. Ironically Josh does this to raise awareness of the poor habits of dog breeding, unfortunately the methods used do more harm than help. He doesn’t care though.
| sex | weezer fan (that should explain it) |
|---|---|
| age | 5 |
| height | 5'4" |
| weakness | his humanity |
Ben
Commonly known as Mr. Slime, Ben ’basketball’ Goblinson is the guitarist of local goblin. He has slightly more nipples than you’d expect him to have!
| sex | jus a guy, amiright? |
|---|---|
| age |
we cut him in half and counted the rings, he's ancient |
| height | unfortunately he keeps eating the tape measure |
| weakness | none. we pray he never turns on us |
Hayden
Born out of a test tube, this sick freak is devoid of true purpose and meaning. Ecstasy alludes the poor creature, forever dancing like keys in front of an infant. The pain is more than shallow, it gauges a deep hole in the heart of this beast. The turmoil in every sleep is as much as to be painful enough to cripple. This fiend reeks of the soil of its upcoming grave. A charlatan dressed in poor grade flesh. Forever waiting to rot Favourite ice cream flavour: rockey road :)
| sex | gorl |
|---|---|
| age | 300 |
| height | 10" |
| weakness | guns. specifically 5.56 and up. |
Elitsa (aka chief keef)
At the age of 7 Elitsa won the international water polo championship. It was later found out she cheated by putting a brick in an opponent's swimsuit. She is not allowed to compete again until 2046.